Finding Some Time To Honour The Self Right Now
When I found this image a few days ago, I saved it to my desktop knowing that it was going to appear here in one of my posts. Meditation is not just about sitting still, it is about a journey for me as I travel through time somehow, or should I say, have time travel to meet me in the present now moment which is all that exists, all that has ever existed.
Time is strange. In each of our journeys through life, we experience so many things that we value as both positive and negative experiences, creating memories that serve to nourish us. We mark these experiences with photographs, with tears, with joy, anger, and some with sadness. They exist within us, always present, accessible consciously and unconsciously. Just think what that means. For example, take a soldier who has been involved in military action that saw friends, enemies and innocent civilians killed; a soldier who because of that experience was scarred and is now diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. That soldier is vulnerable for the experience to reappear in his or her body, heart and mind as though it is occurring just at this moment. The past becomes now. The dividing line of time is erased. Each of us carries our past into each and every moment of our present, consciously or unconsciously. As long as we have memory, the past is present.
Ask a massage of physical therapist about how past physical trauma, and even psychological trauma is carried in the body in the present. Broken bones that have healed, falls, all sorts of trauma shape the way we walk, the way we talk, the way we even breathe and sit still. All of the past is packed into us and carried within us in the present.
The past doesn’t disappear no matter how hard we work at wrapping it up in layer after layer of effort, of denial, of indifference. The best that we can do is to become aware of who we are. It’s not such an easy task as we have to get beneath the clutter of our minds and our busyness and our fantasies – those constantly evolving scenarios of what ever it is we worry about, fear, hope for, plan for, work for – you know, replaying all the possible scenarios of what might be only to arrive at that point and find out that none of the scenarios we fretted over actually came to be in existence. It was all neurotic fantasy. That is the reason one meditates, and it doesn’t matter what form that meditation takes as long as we stop what we are doing, thinking, planning, etc., and take time to be still and be present, really present with our bodies, minds and hearts.